How To Uncover Your Deepest Desire


Imagine the scenario where a genie popped out of nowhere and told you she would grant you unlimited wishes for the rest of your life. What would you wish for?

Recently this exact opportunity was presented to me, only there was no “genie” per se. Instead, it came in the form of a life-altering Theta Healing Training with Jenni Wendell and Kara Potts at The Luminary Farm in Danville, CA.

As a girl who grew up in the Canadian suburbs with three siblings, and very practical parents. It took a long time for me to be willing to share a bag of chips, let alone unfold into the magnanimous possibilities of mind and spirit. 

My path to mind and spirit began safely enough with the now very popular and widely accepted Yogic path. In my 18 year dance with yoga, I have felt its power transform my mind and body. Everyday things that used to be such a challenge, now for the most part tend to glide down my silky feathers. Things such as traffic, an enthusiastic tailgater, my dog getting skunked, plans falling through, or someone not meeting my expectation. While before I would have huffed and puffed and taken it ALL as a personal affront, now, as long as I have fed myself and gotten sleep (I am human after all) they don’t really come up on my radar. I see that there is an opportunity to listen to a great podcast, get out of a crazy person’s way, accept that a stinky dog and a lot of soap and water are in my near future (it is not required that I enjoy this either), sudden free time (my favorite thing ever), or recognize that I set those expectations and that has everything to do with ME, not the person. I still have a long way to go, but progress has been made. Woo hoo, go me!

Studying and practicing yoga has not only helped me in my daily life, it has also opened up my mind up to the fact that there is SO MUCH MORE POSSIBLE than I could have ever dreamed. Yoga set me up to see that underneath the layers of my personality, the roles I play in this life, this body, and my possessions, lies the truth of who I truly am. The entire point of Yoga is to clear the layers in the mind that distort our perception and prevent us from seeing who we truly are. Clearing these layers leads us to Self-realization. In addition, the practices can allow access to higher states of consciousness. In these higher states of consciousness here are a few things in the category of SUPER POWERS that one can attain. You can disappear at will (this could be handy), read minds, know of your previous births, gain inhuman strength, knowledge of the solar system and the organizations of the stars, levitate, have psychic abilities, or your perception can enter another body —just to name a few. Physicists are now seeing that these special abilities are in fact in the realm of possibility. However, all of these special abilities are not the goal and can become just as much of a stumbling block to attaining true freedom and Self-realization due to an attachment to keeping these bad ass skills. 

I tell you all about this to prepare you for what I learned in my Theta Healing Training. A few years ago my inner skeptic would have been way too loud for me to receive these teachings. My yoga, meditation, and study of Patanjali’s Yoga Sutras has brought me to a place where I am now willing to question all of my beliefs —period. Nothing is really as it seems when you look closer.

And so, in my recent training, I learned how to talk to the Being that created the Universe. Yep, you read that right. I learned how to talk to God…Cosmic Consciousness, the Creator of all that is, the Universal mind or whatever you want to call it. Apparently it is not that complicated, and you can ask for whatever you want. Wish = granted.

Growing up, when I had friends over and they would open the fridge for a snack and ask “can I have a yogurt?” I would wither a little inside. In a family of six with a limited grocery budget, we each only got two yogurts. If my friend had one, that meant I would only get one…and yogurt was like gold. My parents wouldn’t buy us fancy snacks like those chocolate covered granola bars or single package chips. Needless to say, a feeling of “not having enough” has followed me into adulthood.

When I first realized I could ask the universe for whatever I wanted, I asked for money. I wanted to have more than enough money to do and have all of the things and experiences I have always wanted. On top of money, I asked for the home of my dreams, horses, and a successful writing career. I was on fire! The sky was the limit! This went on for a few days…then something inside shifted in a profound way. I can’t remember exactly how or when things changed for me, but with the sudden belief that I could have whatever I wanted in this life, that it was ALL available to me, I uncovered my truest desire, and brought it to the surface. My deepest desire is to be connected to source in all of the moments of the day. To be Self-Realized. If I am firmly grounded in who I am, I would not need to depend on my external circumstances to be fulfilled. I would be fulfilled already! All day long, connected to the miracle of life and the universe. Rain or shine. Money or no money. Good health or bad health. Free and connected. YES PLEASE!! AND THANK YOU!!!

Success, fame, and fortune are coveted in our western culture. Yet, time and time again we are reminded that money does not equal happiness. We see celebrities with all of these things and still they are dealing with suffering; like everyone else they are susceptible to substance abuse and mental illness. Clearly money doesn’t remove these things from the equation. There is nothing wrong with setting a financial goal and being successful in a career, the problem is only when we make our precious lives only about these things and in turn are disconnected from the miracle of who we truly are.

The realization of the abundance of this universe also led me to see how incredibly beautiful and overflowing life is already. There are so many things I can be grateful for in any given moment. My beautiful boys —there is a huge list just with them. My healthy body. The love that surrounds me. The wind as it lifts my hair. Soft carpet under the soles of my feet. The crescent moon in a still blue sky. RUNNING WATER that I can drink. And the list goes on. I can choose to see these things that are right in front of me, or I can choose to focus on the things I don’t like or don’t have. Gratitude leads to a softening around my desire for stuff and exotic experiences. I see the external desires for what they are; lovely, wonderful, enjoyable and incredible, but they cannot bring lasting fulfillment. To say that I feel relieved is an understatement. I still plan to pursue my dreams of writing, traveling, and kissing a horse’s velvety nose each morning. In the meantime, I live in my current beautiful circumstance. The journey inward has so much more to offer and I am relieved to say that I see that even more clearly now. As B.K.S. Iyengar says “You do not need to seek freedom in a different land, for it exists with your own body, heart, mind, and soul.” 

What would YOU wish for?

With Love, Nicole